Welcome!

Welcome to the world as I see it. This blog is all about life as I view it, poetry & random ish.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Drama, my hair & my feelings

Females and drama

I don't have time anymore. I'm just gonna be forthright with it. Like if you have a problem w/ me and you say you're real and will confront me....ON FACEBOOK! we have an issue. Yes i had statuses about you bout when I said idc anymore, I truly don't. So, you are now removed from my twitter, phone, and facebook.
Lesi

Monday, September 27, 2010

For my readers

Hey to all of ya'll who read this,
First off, thanks ya'll! I appreciate it that you take time out of your life to look at the drama, the highs and lows of this thing called Lesi's World! Love you guys! Ok, so I kind of want some feedback on what things you like and dislike about this blog so I can make it better. You know, hopefully get some more feedback on things I post cause um.....I get NO comments! So just type a comment 2 me and I'll read and revise the blog according to that.
Love and peace,
Lesi

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Karina Pasian feat. Trey Songz - Understand Me [New July 2010]

Just had to write it

Trapped in a space
And everyone seems to pass by
Never noticing me as I scream
Trapped
By the labels put upon me
Because not many get to know me
Cause let's face it, at some point everyone hurts you
Can't cry cause my tear ducts have long stopped producing tears.
Trapped and emotionless
Can't let anyone in cause what's the point?
Ever alone in this world with
No voice and no one to call on
Just trapped.

Hmmmm..............

When did I become afraid to be me? Afraid to randomly walk up to a stranger and introduce myself? When did I let shyness overcome my natural Lesi-ness? When did I stop being ME and become what people EXPECTED?

Lesi on relationships pt 2

I have to be for real and admit that it is mainly my fault I don't do well in relationships. I think I have a few reasons.
1. I don't communicate well- I will literally freeze you out rather than talk and regret it. I just can't deal w/ people saying my faults. I'm working on it b/c if I want to have a boo, I have to learn to communicate w/o any toxic words.
2. I don't like people- quite frankly, most people annoy me. Makes dating sort of hard, don't you think?
3. I am not open- I'm OPEN MINDED but when it comes to relationships, you'll rarely get how I really feel and this comes from my past relationships and hurting people with things I said.
4. My past-I have to let it go and realize not all males are like my exes.
5. My "type"- apparently I have D boy only tatted on me. Who knew?
6. I want too much too fast-self explantory
7. My hair- I'm natural. Not changing that for not one of these lil boys.
8. My personality- I really don't care about too much other than being treated w/ respect and most dudes can't deal w/ that.
I can admit I have relationship-phobia and I probably will for a while. But nobody ever said it was easy being Lesi.

Vertical Horizon - Everything You Want

Vent Session: Friendship

If I had a wish
I would go back in time to
Last semester when we became cool
I wouldn't bite my tongue or trip over
Losing a friend
I'd be real and tell you when
Comments you made would hurt to the point
I'd lash out on others and not you.
I'd tell you how when
you made every.single.convo about you in some way,
I stopped telling you things.
How I wondered how you could be so tight with someone
And let one little thing tear it apart.
I'd tell you that it hurt when you were negative about me falling
And it hurt worse than his betrayal.
But see I sucked it up and didn't dwell because aye, we were besties
But now it's to the point where I can't do it anymore
I can't deal with at least 75% of the convo being about you
Ya negativity towards me and others
The fact that everything has to go your way
And the fact that our "friendship"
Our friendship seems to mean so little to you.
I mean I'm far from perfect but when you needed me,
I was there & not those you claim "are down through whatever"
But if you don't care, why should I?
This is one of those times where I let people go and sadly,
you're one of those people

Friendship

Is about willing to compromise and talk like any relationship.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Short and sweet

I miss him. Wish I didn't but aye, I do & that's all there is to it.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Random but true

Sometimes you just need to vent

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Hair

B/c I have nothing else to post

Monday, September 20, 2010

So...

Haven't posted about my hair in a while. I was looking at some products that was like $20 plus shipping. Why do people think that college students have that kind of money? Can someone please tell me where I can find quality natural products for cheap?

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Lesi on relationships

I've come to the conclusion that I don't do relationships well. Why? Cause I really don't give a fucx bout most things. If you treat me right and don't b.s., we're good. Most guys don't get that and in fact, hate it. If you wanna go out w/ ya friends, cool. Ima be with my girls and party or w/e. If you wanna watch the game, Ima be there cause you know, I like the game too. Most importantly, I <3 video games. Don't judge me. Honestly, if I could find a dude that's a good dude and don't be on that shit, we good.
I don't know how many times I have to say it though: YOU SHOULD THANK THE EXES FOR MAKING THE DUDE YOU WITH (if he treat you right) THAT DUDE. Don't be a hater and don't be a bitch. She's the reason he's good to you and the reason you're with him. It's just doing too much if you gonna hate b/c she's trying to be happy in a new relationship.
Mainly, don't settle when it comes to a relationship. When he starts treating you like shit, you dip. There's no point in settling for less than you deserve when you deserve to be happy.
Lesi

Friday, September 10, 2010

Monday, September 6, 2010

Letter to my ex

Dear G,
It's funny how when I was younger, you were the guy EVERYBODY wanted and I had to have. I remember writing notes and you trying to figure em out. I remember how you used to walk me to class and stay until I hugged you or told you bye. Sneaking on the phone w/ you was pure enjoyment and I loved every second of it. You were amazing and I thought I would be yours forever and the fairy tale wouldn't end.
That changed when my younger cousin entered the picture. We both did some crazy shit through her that fucked us up and when the trust was gone, it was gone. POOF! The magic was over and my eyes cleared to see who you really were: arrogant, selfish, mean spirited, always putting me down in little ways and while you spoiled me, that fucked me up for relationships in the future. In the end it was my fault for always running back to you even when you hurt me. I was stupid enough to think that loving you would make everything better and if I stayed, things wouldn't change. Honestly, I'm glad they changed because you weren't anything but an abusive loser who thought nothing of almost fucking a girl 6 years your junior.
I can say I was stupid to go back but now I see I wasn't the only one. You could charm us and turn us against each other to the point where we didn't want to hear anything another female would say about you. All I know is that now, I can actually be in a functional relationship if I want to and that I don't have to worry about pleasing you or anything. I made the right choice when I chose family over the dick.
Candace Alesia'

Saturday, September 4, 2010

I am not a ho

Declarations

I will never understand why you treat me the way you do and I talk it to prove undying loyalty to you when all you do is use me. My friends are right you're a douche and for real, I gotta leave u alone cuz if I don't, this won't ever get resolved.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Team no cuffn and more

procrastination

my friends and I...have issues. This is the result of too much craziness and a ho named name Treetop! LOL shoutouts to Sexxxyyy and Fione! :D

randoms

I just don't get it aka goodbye Huey

How can you say all these wonderful things and yet, treat me like I'm an offbrand bitch? I was there were ya niggas weren't and when you were going through, I let you vent. We had an equal friendship until the day that I said what u were thinking: why not be together? Then you got upset and distanced yourself. It's ok but it still hurts and I wish you hadn't. But to move on, I gotta let you go and this is how I do it.
Alesia

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Explaination

I was kind of upset earlier. Both my grandmothers are in the hospital and I just need a break. Huey and I aren't cool and Sweetz and I are rocky. *sigh* The love life of Lesi. To make matters worse, I have to see the ho I think Huey messed with while we were talking. I just need a break.
Things are kind of looking up though. I mean, I'm talking to someone new named Bubbles who seems cool. But I have a Spanish test to study for so maybe I'll video update this later!
Alesia

don't mean to be rude but

FUCK THE WORLD WITH A LONG DICK