Well excuse me.
I thought I was done talking to and about my ex aka THE ex but apparently not. For everybody who doesn't know, the ex and I have been through hell and back. He was there when my nieces were born, he was there when I remembered by childhood and he was there for every moment that could possibly happen in the life of a young lady. But somehow, we became emotionally abusive to each other and yes, once even physically abusive (I hit him btw). Eventually we parted was but not before he managed to emotionally and possibly physically cheat on me with my 5 year younger cousin. He's two years older than I am. I digress though. This summer, it looked like always + forever were about to get back together and it was gonna be fun times. Sadly it wasn't. This time it got verbally abusive and we stopped before it reached the point of us being together.
He texted me today.
He's leaving for basic I guess and he just wanted to clarify somethings. He said bye and told me he took my pics w/ him. I don't know why though. We weren't talking. I mean deleted off Facebook, Twitter, Skype, etc. No contact then this? I'm confused. I mean it's crazy.
I still love him.
It's that first love shit. He was my everything for such a long time that....I don't know. I just can't talk to him b/c he's just so wrong for me. I want more for myself than to be his wifey or whatever. I mean, engagements are one thing. Weddings are another. It's like I think too much about this and I start remembering the good times. Those times are gone and aren't coming back. I can't afford to backtrack.